Get out your phone and do something useful with it.
Take initiative with someone.
You know that guy in the band that you don’t know as well, or the team member you’ve never talked with one on one, or the person’s texts you’ve ignored the last few times or the person who popped into your head when you read “take initiative with someone”?
Take initiative.
Today. Ask them to dinner or drinks or popsicles.
Today. Now. Right now.
If you aren’t willing to take initiative for the sake of others (and for the sake of your life), eventually you will become relationally bankrupt.
Talk less
Listen way more
Give attention (unselfish), as opposed to paying attention (expecting something in return)
Nothing is happening on Netflix, Twitter, Facebook, Periscope or e-mail that will be more life giving and meaningful than carrying out this task.
You can do this. You’re out of practice but you can do this.
I’m always interested in your perspective, whether affirming or dissenting. Continue the conversation anytime: gabethebassplayer@gmail.com
I don’t drive a nice car. For those of you who have followed my blogging for a long time…yep, it’s still that same car.
My car is completely forgettable, although at times laughable. It’s not desirable (except by me, I love it), and an eye sore even in a Waffle House parking lot.
But all it would take is one little improvement to my car to make it the most desirable machine on the planet, to turn heads, to be the envy of billionaires.
If it did everything it does now…while constantly levitating one inch off the ground.
My car would go from being the Joker to being the Queen. I would be King, obviously.
Suddenly no one would care about the spaceship noise that it makes, because it basically would be a spaceship. Suddenly everyone’s eyes would bypass the scratches in the paint and proclaim it’s beauty.
One inch. That’s it.
My car is forgettable because it does what everyone else’s does, only it’s uglier.
But change one little thing. Change one inch, and it’s a completely different story.
What’s your one inch?
If you’re an artist, I’ll tell you what levitating one inch is: a chorus, a great one.
Maybe your getting uglier, you’re tired, you have some deep scratches, you’ve been around for a while, you pretty much do what everyone else does only it’s forgettable.
A chorus is your one inch of levitation.
Everyone will come watch no matter how battered and beaten you are.
I’m always interested in your perspective, whether affirming or dissenting. Continue the conversation anytime: gabethebassplayer@gmail.com
Children (and lots of adults) want hard things to be easy. They walk around all day wishing the difficulty and uncomfortableness in their lives would go away…and become easy.
Mature people don’t wish for hard things, or meaningful things, to be easy. They see the hard thing and embrace the difficulty, not wishing for it to become easier (leveling the mountain) but persist and commit to the task for what it is (climbing the mountain).
We need to stop looking for and wishing for doors to fly open with a flick of our finger. (It’s ok if this happens to happen.)
We need to be more excited about a door that demands our shoulder be put into it.
I’m always interested in your perspective, whether affirming or dissenting. Continue the conversation anytime: gabethebassplayer@gmail.com
A: Hi Mr. Repave, I’ve heard you do good work and I trust my sources…How much is it to repave my driveway?
B: $1000
A: Really? Will you do it for $600?
B: I could do 60% of it for $600
A: No, I want you to do 100%, great work for $600
B: This isn’t going to work.
—
A: Hi Mr. Repave, I’ve heard you do good work and I trust my sources…How much is it to repave my driveway?
B: $1000
A: I see. That’s more than I have right now. When I have the money together, I’ll give you a call back and have you come do the work.
B: Looking forward to it.
—
A: Hi Mr. Repave, I’ve heard you do good work and I trust my sources…How much is it to repave my driveway?
B: $1000
A: Great, when can we get started.
—
There’s something about not negotiating a price.
It says to the provider “You have an accurate view of how valuable you and your services are. You are smart and intelligent and I’m not going to call you a liar or a dummy by offering you something lower”.
The person in conversation #1 is trying to convince Mr. Repave that he has an inaccurate view of his worth. That’s insulting. It’s never going to lead to a good place.
It’s ok if you don’t have the money, like in conversation #2, but the person in conversation #2 didn’t disrespect Mr. Repave by telling him he’s foolish for charging $1000. This person essentially said “It’s worth every bit of $1000. That’s the right price and it’s a good value that I happen to not be able to afford right now”. There is mutual respect there.
The person in conversation #3 is going to have a great experience with Mr. Repave. There’s mutual trust and respect happening and a mutually beneficial agreement of services and money.
I’m not saying never barter. I actually love a good back and forth.
You’ll have to use your own instincts and intellect to gauge when it’s ok to negotiate and when not to.
Just remember paying someone what they ask for, there’s power in that, for what it says about them and what it says about you.
I’m always interested in your perspective, whether affirming or dissenting. Continue the conversation anytime: gabethebassplayer@gmail.com
Some of the smartest most successful people I know and know of…I can’t really tell you exactly what they do. There’s no real definition. They might have a loose job description, but they do so much more, put so much of themselves into their work that their actual job description is just a formality.
They are invaluable and the borders of their actual work (professional, emotional, relational, etc) are undefined because they cover such a wide landscape.
So I scratch my head and think, I don’t really know what he/she does.
This is likely not the case in your band and team. True, most people’s jobs on your team are probably undefined too, but this stems from the opposite end of the spectrum: lack of purpose, vision, community, trust, ambition and teamwork. The un-definition based jobs on your team are not undefined because people are lighting the world on fire everyday with their character and ambition.
You thinking “I don’t really know what he does” is rooted in a very different place.
Your “undefined” workers have a different definition.
When you don’t know what the drummer or agent has been doing all week or month, when their work is undefined, the easiest thing to think is “They must be doing something valuable, I mean, they love this band, right? I’m sure they’re not just sitting around not putting themselves on the line. I’m sure they’re tackling the next project”.
I know you really really want to believe that everyone on the team is applying themselves and contributing to the goal. But if you don’t know they are…they’re not.
You have team members without definition because of assumption, fear, false hope and lack of responsibility in your leadership.
Chances are the people on your team who’s role can’t be defined have never had a clearly defined role to begin with.
Start there. With yourself and then with the others.
The people talked about in the first couple paragraphs became undefinable by first becoming extremely defined.
I’m always interested in your perspective, whether affirming or dissenting. Continue the conversation anytime: gabethebassplayer@gmail.com
